|
Anneke Zwart
Student (University), Netherlands
|
How to Disagree with a Superior: Recommendations
Disagreeing with someone who is more powerful than you (e.g., your manager) can put you in a difficult situation. You have to carefully think about WHAT to say and more importantly the WAY you express your disagreements.
 Gallo (2016) puts forward 9 tips with regard to disagreeing with your manager:
- BE REALISTIC ABOUT THE RISKS: Because people tend to think in worst-case scenarios, they overestimate the risks involved in openly disagreeing with their superiors. You should also think carefully about the risks of NOT 'speaking up'. After that, you can more realistically weigh the possible positive and negative outcomes.
- TIMING: Once the above risk assessment concludes that speaking up is the better option, then it is important to carefully think about the timing of speaking up. You might need more time to rethink the issue. You may benefit from getting more insights or views from colleagues, and develop your 'army' in case there are lots of opposing views. The setting is also important in timing: try to discuss the issue privately rather than publicly.
- SHARED GOALS: If you are able to connect your thoughts on the issue to a shared goal of you and your superior, your chances of being heard and able to convince the other party are higher. By contextualizing your statements, people will see in what way your thoughts contribute to the shared goals.
- ASK PERMISSION: Announce that you are disagreeing and ask your superior for permission to set out your arguments. It will provide your superior with some psychological safety and control.
- BE CALM: Although the idea of openly disagreeing with your superior may make you nervous, that will only undercut the message. So try to find ways to remain calm: taking deep breaths, slowing pace etc. can help.
- VALIDATION: Start by articulating the views of the other(s) first. This will create a strong basis for the discussion.
- DON'T JUDGE: Carefully choose the words you want to use to share your thoughts. It is particularly important to focus on the facts, stay neutral and avoid ‘judgement words’.
- POLITENESS: Slightly understating your confidence in your thoughts will leave some space for dialogue. Show others that you are aware of the fact that your view is just another opinion and openly invite them to present other views.
- ACKNOWLEDGE THE POWER OF YOUR SUPERIOR: One should not backtrack on one's views, but at the same time the final decision will be made by your superior and it is important to acknowledge that.
⇒ Do you have a further tip on how to handle the situation of having a different opinion than your boss? Please share your experiences...
Source: Gallo, A. “How to Disagree with Someone More Powerful than You” HBR March 2016.
X
Welcome to the Communication and Skills best practices. The topic being discussed here is: "How to Disagree with a Superior: Recommendations".
Would you like to sign up to read all responses and to join this discussion yourself?
Log in
| |
|
anuradha
Career Consultant, India
|
|
How to Disagree with the Superior
The above mentioned points are absolutely relevant...
|
| |
|
C.L. Kappagomtula
Professor, Malaysia
|
|
Eulogy of Julius Caesar is the Perfect Case Study
Yes, when you have to disagree with your superiors...
|
| |
|
Javier Elenes
Business Consultant, Mexico
|
|
Don´t Disagree; Instead Ask a Key Question
I recommend you do not disagree with a superior.
...
|
| |
|
David Lee
Business Consultant, United Kingdom
|
|
How to Disagree with a Superior
Anneke and the subsequent responders provide a com...
|
| |
|
Paramathmuni srinivas Kumar
India
|
|
Healthy Debate May Resolve
A subordinate in disagreement may be having a vali...
|
| |
|
Bashe
Manager, South Africa
|
|
Disagreeing with Superior
Great article. I recently used the 9 points, in pa...
|
| |
|
Juan Perez Eras, Mexico
|
|
Disagreeing When You Have Technical Arguments
The WORST THING IS TO REMAIN SILENT when you are n...
|
| |
|
Afshan Ali
HR Consultant, Pakistan
|
|
Disagreement with your Supervisor
It is useful to ASSESS THE USUAL LEADERSHIP STYLE ...
|
| |
|
Dwarica
Student (University), Trinidad and Tobago
|
|
Disagreeing with a Superior
Interesting article.
Sometimes we should assess w...
|
| |
|
Paramathmuni srinivas Kumar
India
|
|
Disagreement in the Form of Constructive Criticism after Preparation
As per experiential system CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM ...
|
| |
|
Adrian Green
Coach, United Kingdom
|
|
Balthasar Gracian's Quote on Advising a Prince
@Nathalie De Broux: Hello Nathalie! I trust all i...
|
| |
|
Emmanuel Mwirichia
Manager, Kenya
|
|
Always Agree with your Superior (in Public)... Before Disagreeing (In Private)
Firstly, remember your superior is probably dealin...
|
| |
|
Benjamin Motlhabane
Consultant, South Africa
|
|
Diplomacy is Key
I see a lot of disagreements in my current place o...
|
| |
|
Kabesha
Zambia
|
|
Agree to Disagree
First state the point of view of your superior and...
|
| |
|
Paramathmuni srinivas Kumar
India
|
|
A State of Equanimity by the Boss is Key
There is a saying that to maintain a good relation...
|
| |
|
oostvoorn
Coach, Netherlands
|
|
Superiority Itself is Debatable
I’m convinced that no person is superior to anothe...
|
| |
|
Dil Prasad Shrestha, PhD
Management Consultant, Nepal
|
|
Disagreeing with the Boss/Superior
I think it depends on the NATURE OF THE JOB and th...
|
| |
|
Mumtaz Uddin Ahmed
Management Consultant, Pakistan
|
|
Disagree versus Experience
If the supervisor is experienced, (s)he can raise ...
|
| |
|
Sascha A. Carlin, Germany
|
|
Polite / Friendly
Hi all… Anneke, what you listed is how anyone shou...
|
| |
|
Chander Shenoy
Business Consultant, India
|
|
Analyze the Situation and its Impact Objectively
Galo's tips are quite comprehensive and very relev...
|
| |
|
Jacques-Alain TIAKO
Manager, France
|
|
Solving Conflicts And/or Disagreements with a Manager
1. PREPARATION of the Face-to-Face meeting with th...
|
| |
|
William Stadler
Manager, United States
|
|
How to Disagree with a Superior
This is a valuable lesson and all the feedback her...
|
| |
|
GUADALUPE GABRIEL
Manager, Mexico
|
|
Disagreement with a Superior: Assertivity and Empathy
@Anuradha: I agree and suggest following rule of ...
|
| |
|
Dr Hyacinth C. Abara
Student (Other), Norway
|
|
Only Present your Strongest Points
Thank you, @David Lee. Your recommendation strikes...
|
| |
|
Nagarajan.S
Manager, Singapore
|
|
Superior is Probably more Experienced
Practically your superior should be someone that i...
|
| |
|
Ashutosh Narayan
Student (MBA)
|
|
Theoretical Aspects and Practical Solutions of Disagreeing with your Manager
By reading the main article one can learn the THEO...
|
| |
|
RAJNARAYANAN B
Teacher, India
|
|
How to Disagree with a Centralized Superior/Boss
While having all these thoughts we also need to co...
|
| |
|
Engel
Project Manager, Germany
|
|
Quote from Steve Jobs on Smart People
Beside all the wise advises about integrity and ti...
|
| |
|
NYAMEKA MAKITSHI
Manager, South Africa
|
|
Disagreeing with your Superior
First it is important to understand what the Super...
|
| |
|
Dennis
Student (University), Zimbabwe
|
|
Disagreeing with Democratic and Autocratic Leaders
I agree with @Afshan Ali that disagreeing with you...
|
| |
|
Abu Bakarr Dumbuya
Student (MBA), Sierra Leone
|
|
First Agree to Disagree with your Superior
It is no crime to disagree with your superior, but...
|
| |
|
Amar Deep Seetohul
Manager, Mauritius
|
|
Disagreeing with your Superior Benefits from Trust and Relationship
Among the 10 subordinates who report to me directl...
|
| |
|
Juan Perez Eras, Mexico
|
|
Ego Limits Ability to Listen
@Nagarajan.S: In certain occasions, leaders of or...
|
| |
|
S. Lago
Business Consultant, Canada
|
|
Create a Document (Handout)
I agree with the above comments that have been mad...
|
| |
|
Andre-Ambrosio ABRAMCZUK
Teacher, Brazil
|
|
Disagreeing with the Superior in Writing
Once I heard about a boss who allowed his subordin...
|
| |
|
Jaap de Jonge
Editor, Netherlands
|
|
Cultural Aspects of Disagreeing with Someone Else
Nice contributions, everybody! This page has becom...
|
| |
|
Chander Shenoy
Business Consultant, India
|
|
Put Yourself in your Boss's Shoes
@Jaap de Jonge: That's indeed a very good remark, ...
|
| |
|
Musiyandaka Donna
Student (University), Zimbabwe
|
|
Disagree with the Organisation in Mind
When disagreeing, it is also important to think of...
|
| |
|
Gavril
Management Consultant, Albania
|
|
No Best Way to Disagree with any Superior
I worked with both open minded superiors as well a...
|
| |
|
Delfor Ibarra
Consultant, Argentina
|
|
To Dissent is Part of Loyalty
However, it is the way of transmitting dissent tha...
|
| |
|
Borje Vickberg, Sweden
|
|
Disagreeing with a Trump-like Superior
Interesting ideas and reflexions. However as was m...
|
| |
|
Francis
Manager, Thailand
|
|
No One is Always Right and that Includes Yourself!
Disagreement happens everyday but always remember ...
|
| |
|
Delfor Ibarra
Consultant, Argentina
|
|
Gracias Francis!
@Francis: It is possible that my point of view in ...
|
| |
|
Chander Shenoy
Business Consultant, India
|
|
Motivate your Disagreement with Org Goals
@Musiyandaka Donna: I agree that if you link disag...
|
| |
|
Leslie Leckie
Student (University), Jamaica
|
|
How to Disagree with a Superior
It is indeed important for staff members to realiz...
|
| |
|
Maurice Hogarth
Consultant, United Kingdom
|
|
Disagreeing with a Line Senior: Itemized Response Approach
A person may be “senior” to me (as manager or clie...
|
|
|
|
|
Log in
