How to Disagree with a Superior: Recommendations

How to Disagree with a Superior: Recommendations

Disagreeing with someone who is more powerful than you (e.g., your manager) can put you in a difficult situation. You have to carefully think about WHAT to say and more importantly the WAY you express your disagreements.
Gallo (2016) puts forward 9 tips with regard to disagreeing with your manager:

1. BE REALISTIC ABOUT THE RISKS: Because people tend to think in worst-case scenarios, they overestimate the risks involved in openly disagreeing with their superiors. You should also think carefully about the risks of NOT 'speaking up'. After that, you can more realistically weigh the possible positive and negative outcomes.
2. TIMING: Once the above risk assessment concludes that speaking up is the better option, then it is important to carefully think about the timing of speaking up. You might need more time to rethink the issue. You may benefit from getting more insights or views from colleagues, and develop your 'army' in case there are lots of opposing views. The setting is also important in timing: try to discuss the issue privately rather than publicly.
3. SHARED GOALS: If you are able to connect your thoughts on the issue to a shared goal of you and your superior, your chances of being heard and able to convince the other party are higher. By contextualizing your statements, people will see in what way your thoughts contribute to the shared goals.
4. ASK PERMISSION: Announce that you are disagreeing and ask your superior for permission to set out your arguments. It will provide your superior with some psychological safety and control.
5. BE CALM: Although the idea of openly disagreeing with your superior may make you nervous, that will only undercut the message. So try to find ways to remain calm: taking deep breaths, slowing pace etc. can help.
   
6. VALIDATION: Start by articulating the views of the other(s) first. This will create a strong basis for the discussion.
7. DON'T JUDGE: Carefully choose the words you want to use to share your thoughts. It is particularly important to focus on the facts, stay neutral and avoid ‘judgement words’.
8. POLITENESS: Slightly understating your confidence in your thoughts will leave some space for dialogue. Show others that you are aware of the fact that your view is just another opinion and openly invite them to present other views.
   
9. ACKNOWLEDGE THE POWER OF YOUR SUPERIOR: One should not backtrack on one's views, but at the same time the final decision will be made by your superior and it is important to acknowledge that.

⇒ Do you have a further tip on how to handle the situation of having a different opinion than your boss? Please share your experiences...

Source: Gallo, A. “How to Disagree with Someone More Powerful than You” HBR March 2016.

		anuradha Career Consultant, India
	How to Disagree with the Superior The above mentioned points are absolutely relevant (...)

		C.L. Kappagomtula Professor, Malaysia
	Eulogy of Julius Caesar is the Perfect Case Study Yes, when you have to disagree with your superiors (...)

		Javier Elenes Business Consultant, Mexico
	Don´t Disagree; Instead Ask a Key Question I recommend you do not disagree with a superior. (...)

		David Lee Business Consultant, United Kingdom
	How to Disagree with a Superior Anneke and the subsequent responders provide a com (...)

		srinivas Lecturer, India
	Healthy Debate May Resolve A subordinate in disagreement may be having a vali (...)

		Bashe Manager, South Africa
	Disagreeing with Superior Great article. I recently used the 9 points, in pa (...)

		Juan Perez Eras
	Disagreeing When You Have Technical Arguments The WORST THING IS TO REMAIN SILENT when you are n (...)

		Afshan Ali HR Consultant, Pakistan
	Disagreement with your Supervisor It is useful to ASSESS THE USUAL LEADERSHIP STYLE (...)

		Dwarica Student (University), Trinidad and Tobago
	Disagreeing with a Superior Interesting article. Sometimes we should assess w (...)

		srinivas Lecturer, India
	Disagreement in the Form of Constructive Criticism after Preparation As per experiential system CONSTRUCTIVE CRITICISM (...)

		Adrian Green Coach, United Kingdom
	Balthasar Gracian's Quote on Advising a Prince @Nathalie De Broux: Hello Nathalie! I trust all i (...)

		Emmanuel Mwirichia Manager, Kenya
	Always Agree with your Superior (in Public)... Before Disagreeing (In Private) Firstly, remember your superior is probably dealin (...)

		Benjamin Motlhabane Consultant, South Africa
	Diplomacy is Key I see a lot of disagreements in my current place o (...)

		Kabesha Zambia
	Agree to Disagree First state the point of view of your superior and (...)

		srinivas Lecturer, India
	A State of Equanimity by the Boss is Key There is a saying that to maintain a good relation (...)

		oostvoorn Coach, Netherlands
	Superiority Itself is Debatable I’m convinced that no person is superior to anothe (...)

		Dil Prasad Shrestha, PhD Management Consultant, Nepal
	Disagreeing with the Boss/Superior I think it depends on the NATURE OF THE JOB and th (...)

		Mumtaz Uddin Ahmed Management Consultant, Pakistan
	Disagree versus Experience If the supervisor is experienced, (s)he can raise (...)

		Sascha A. Carlin
	Polite / Friendly Hi all… Anneke, what you listed is how anyone shou (...)

		Chander Shenoy Business Consultant, India
	Analyze the Situation and its Impact Objectively Galo's tips are quite comprehensive and very relev (...)

		Jacques-Alain TIAKO Manager, France
	Solving Conflicts And/or Disagreements with a Manager 1. PREPARATION of the Face-to-Face meeting with th (...)

		William Stadler Manager, United States
	How to Disagree with a Superior This is a valuable lesson and all the feedback her (...)

		GUADALUPE GABRIEL Manager, Mexico
	Disagreement with a Superior: Assertivity and Empathy @Anuradha: I agree and suggest following rule of (...)

		Dr Hyacinth C. Abara Student (Other), Norway
	Only Present your Strongest Points Thank you, @David Lee. Your recommendation strikes (...)

		Nagarajan.S Manager, Singapore
	Superior is Probably more Experienced Practically your superior should be someone that i (...)

		Ashutosh Narayan Student (MBA)
	Theoretical Aspects and Practical Solutions of Disagreeing with your Manager By reading the main article one can learn the THEO (...)

		RAJNARAYANAN B Teacher, India
	How to Disagree with a Centralized Superior/Boss While having all these thoughts we also need to co (...)

		Engel Project Manager, Germany
	Quote from Steve Jobs on Smart People Beside all the wise advises about integrity and ti (...)

		NYAMEKA MAKITSHI Manager, South Africa
	Disagreeing with your Superior First it is important to understand what the Super (...)

		Dennis Student (University), Zimbabwe
	Disagreeing with Democratic and Autocratic Leaders I agree with @Afshan Ali that disagreeing with you (...)

		Abu Bakarr Dumbuya Student (MBA), Sierra Leone
	First Agree to Disagree with your Superior It is no crime to disagree with your superior, but (...)

		Amar Deep Seetohul Manager, Mauritius
	Disagreeing with your Superior Benefits from Trust and Relationship Among the 10 subordinates who report to me directl (...)

		Juan Perez Eras
	Ego Limits Ability to Listen @Nagarajan.S: In certain occasions, leaders of or (...)

		S. Lago Business Consultant, Canada
	Create a Document (Handout) I agree with the above comments that have been mad (...)

		Andre-Ambrosio ABRAMCZUK Teacher, Brazil
	Disagreeing with the Superior in Writing Once I heard about a boss who allowed his subordin (...)

		Jaap de Jonge Editor, Netherlands
	Cultural Aspects of Disagreeing with Someone Else Nice contributions, everybody! This page has becom (...)

		Chander Shenoy Business Consultant, India
	Put Yourself in your Boss's Shoes @Jaap de Jonge: That's indeed a very good remark, (...)

		Musiyandaka Donna Student (University), Zimbabwe
	Disagree with the Organisation in Mind When disagreeing, it is also important to think of (...)

		Gavril Management Consultant, Albania
	No Best Way to Disagree with any Superior I worked with both open minded superiors as well a (...)

		Delfor Ibarra Consultant, Argentina
	To Dissent is Part of Loyalty However, it is the way of transmitting dissent tha (...)

		Borje Vickberg
	Disagreeing with a Trump-like Superior Interesting ideas and reflexions. However as was m (...)

		Francis Manager, Thailand
	No One is Always Right and that Includes Yourself! Disagreement happens everyday but always remember (...)

		Delfor Ibarra Consultant, Argentina
	Gracias Francis! @Francis: It is possible that my point of view in (...)

		Chander Shenoy Business Consultant, India
	Motivate your Disagreement with Org Goals @Musiyandaka Donna: I agree that if you link disag (...)

		Leslie Leckie Student (University), Jamaica
	How to Disagree with a Superior It is indeed important for staff members to realiz (...)

		Maurice Hogarth Consultant, United Kingdom
	Disagreeing with a Line Senior: Itemized Response Approach A person may be “senior” to me (as manager or clie (...)