Intelligence of the Heart




Emotional Intelligence
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Jacob George
Financial Consultant, India

Intelligence of the Heart

I shall begin with some some real life incidents that happened to me.

Incident 1: the girl standing up for her friend.
One day I was traveling in a general compartment of a train. To be precise it was the 2.30PM train to Chennai from Trivandrum. It was the time after Diwali holidays so the train was heavily crowded. A group of students had occupied a section of the compartment and they were occupying the top seats too (intended for luggage), and there were ladies too. The students at the top had to climb down to share some food with their friends at bottom. All students climbed down with ease except one girl, who didn’t know how to climb down. Her friends at bottom started to joke and laugh at her, joined by some co passengers, like “if you don’t know to climb down why did you go up”. Immediately after the laughing ceased, a girl from the bottom birth got up and walked down to the aisle (where normally people climb up/down). She gestured to her friend to climb down. Her friend on top told her that she was afraid, to which she gestured with her hand that “don’t worry, If any thing awkward happens I will take care”. Astonisingly the other girl climbed down with little or no help from the one at bottom. I thought of standing up and applauding at the instant. But showed a thumbs up sign to the other girl to which she nodded (thankfully).
Back during my train journey I kept pondering over what type of intelligence had the girl used which made her rise meteorically like a hero, for some (at least one) during the situation. Was it her academic skills that mattered?

Incident 2: The opportunity to help an old lady
A couple of months back I was undertaking the same train. A local vendor (an old lady) was selling some eatables. After making her sale, tired of the days work, she asked a passenger sitting at the window seat to kindly let her sit, as she was feeling headache and she could breathe fresh air. He refused. A local passenger sitting at the aisle row (near to the window), got up and offered his seat. He left at the direction of exit, towards the back side of the coach. I joined him. He told me that he didn’t have the money nor the need to buy what the old lady was selling. But he was thinking of how he can be of help to the vendor. It was much like a God-sent opportunity for him, to help the old lady! When I returned to my seat I could find the vendor cracking joke with another old lady sitting next to her!

Incident 3: The friend refusing to drink.
This happened during my first job. I was in sales, and our company was a hardcore sales organization. There was a particular friend of mine who had engineering as well as a management degree. Since we were in sales we would have parties after our month end on reaching our targets. Drinks were common in such parties. This particular friend (say X) of mine would not take drinks during college days or not so far. To make our boss feel elated we told him that sir X has not taken drinks so far, but maybe you can make him drink today. We all sat in a room for the routine and my boss announced that Mr X is joining us tonight for drinks. Though my friend resisted, in the end he succumbed to what my boss demanded. We all thought our boss had won. He asked to place glasses as per the head count. Drinks were poured in each glasses. My boss declared that Mr X would start the party today by sipping first. We all told 'cheers' raising our glasses. Then something unusual happened. My friend X dropped his glass on the table, looked straight into the eyes of my boss and said ”Boss, even if none among us is going to drink a peg more from these glasses again, I won't touch this glass any more!” We all knew our boss had a terrible anger (he had told not to drop our glasses without drinking a sip after saying cheers), but instead he told us 'Mr X won't join us tonight for drinks'. Lets us drink and enjoy. Mr X joined us for the party, but did not take any drinks.
The next day at office I just asked my friend where did he get the courage to tell NO to my boss. My friend laughed at me and a bit hesitantly told me his story:
His mother took much pains to see him through his studies. His father was a drunkard. While he was a kid, he was the eldest (he had two younger sisters), his father would come home drunk and fight with his mother and beat her for not giving him the money to drink. His mother would silently suffer all these but took a promise from him while he was a kid. When he grew up he WON'T drink. My friend then told me “tomorrow I may stand to lose my job / career. But I am not worried. I don’t want to break the promise given to my mother”. Frankly I fumbled for words. I did not know how to answer him. That day when I went to my bosses' cabin I knew I had a job in hand.

We have addressed the instances that happened. Well what was in these situations that mattered? I recall my childhood lessons where we studied a subject which had less than an hour a week. I am talking of moral science. It reminded myself that this is the most important subject, because you can forget all the subjects on your academics but not this one, because it teaches you how to live. We all know of the intelligence of the brain and we term ourselves as intelligent beings. There are well known methods to measure intelligence of the brain like IQ tests and academic brilliance. But does brain alone has intelligence for us intelligent beings?

Recalling the incidents mentioned above in none of the cases it was a case of intelligence of the brain that mattered. It was something else that mattered that made them stand up in the situation, a deviation from the normal phase. I have brushed through the available resources, but all speak of intelligence of brain alone, but there is something beyond, intelligence of something else, INTELLIGENCE OF THE HEART. It can be associated with the term Emotional Intelligence (EI). It speaks of intelligence of the heart!
I have tried to observe these kind of people, and have found the following common traits of people with a high amount of Intelligence of the Heart (IH).
1. At Perfect Harmony with Themselves : This is a distinguishing feature of IH people. IH people are always at perfect harmony with themselves. They enjoy / indulge in solitude more than anyone else. They tend not to escape rather enjoy it. This can be more pronounced / observed during journey times. People try all sort of things like sleeping, Reading , Listening to music , Playing games, Doing work, operate laptop etc to escape the boredom. But IH people on the other hand rather than escaping, indulge in it. They observe things around them , Watch nature etc and don’t make others feel they are bored. They enjoy solitude rather than avoid it.
2. Authentic : Authencity -- What is the word meaning. Does it have anything to do with the moral fabric of a person? It simply can be said as the power to be oneself. IH people are authentic. Their direction and priorities are clear.
3. Honest : IH people are honest. They stand up to any situation were they require to exhibit this trait.
4. Respect the other sex: IH people respect and honour the opposite sex.
5. Observers : IH people are keen observers . They are aware of the situations around them. They observe other people, things around them as well nature.
6. Thinkers : IH people are good thinkers. They use the help of their brains in making judgments / conclusions.
7. Proactive : Proactive ness notes their ability to master situations. Rather than being a slave to situations they master the given situation. Proactive ness notes their ability to guess how a situation would unfold and hence act accordingly. Proactive rather than reactive.
8. Logical : IH people have a definite reason / Logic for everything. They do things / arrive at judgments based on this logic.
 

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14
Paramathmuni srinivas Kumar
India
 

Boundary Conditions Do Not Matter for People with Intelligence of the Heart

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3
Olga Flournoy
Consultant, United States
 

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3
Sushil Bhasin
Facilitator and Corporate Trainer, Educator, India
 

Heart and Mind

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0
Shubhra Gabel
Manager, India
 

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Kimani Njau
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Olufemi Esan, Nigeria
 

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Paramathmuni srinivas Kumar
India
 

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Zeb O. WATURUOCHA
Management Consultant, India
 

Intelligence of the Heart Requires Presencing

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Roy Duffy, United Kingdom
 

Intelligence of the Heart Straightforward and Simple Process

Thank you Jacob for this timely reminder of the power of our moral and emotional values. You see, fo... Sign up

 
4
Paul Eduvie
Student (University), Nigeria
 

Link Between Intelligence of the Heart and Intelligence of the Brain

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Tom Lisenby
Manager, United States
 

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Sorni Tindanzo Namateng
Student (University), Ghana
 

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2
Julie Fillion
Business Consultant, Canada
 

Intelligence of the Heart makes the World a Better Place

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0
Myrissa Melinda Lacuna-Alip
Student (University), Philippines
 

High IQ, but no Intelligence of the Heart

Thank you very much George Jacob for that very comprehensive discussion. I totally agree! I would pr... Sign up

 
2
V Morgan
Consultant, United States
 

Intelligence of the Heart is Related to Life Lessons

IH certainly balances one's personality. One may even say that IH is related to life lessons that we... Sign up

 
3
Heather Scantlebury
CEO
 

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2
KATHRYN STEINER, MBA
Entrepreneur, United States
 

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M. Srivastava
Project Manager, India
 

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0
Jeketule Jacob Soko
Management Consultant, Kenya
 

Emotional Intelligence

Indeed the title is an attention 'getter'. I liked also the beginning of the discussion with experie... Sign up

 
2
RVRao
Management Consultant, India
 

Intelligence of the Heart and Courage of Conviction in Management

He article is educative. It highlights courage of conviction. Many instances are there where other... Sign up

 
2
Terence Pradhan
 

Emotional Intelligence is Influenced by Intelligence of the Heart

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2
Rob Careman
CEO, Netherlands
 

Intelligence of the Heart is Not Heard

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1
Prof. Alkis S. Magdalinos
Business Consultant, Greece
 

Intelligence of the Heart

The comments of Jacob George (about Greece) and M. Srivastava touched my heart... Most comments are ... Sign up

 
0
Tarja Laila Marita Raman
Partner, Finland
 

Intelligence of Heart is a Cultural Value

@Srinivas : your above video is wonderful. Nature feels no mercy, when body needs food, but it is no... Sign up

 
0
COL SUNDER LALVANI
Coach, India
 

Formula for the Least Flawed Conduct

My questions are: 1. Do we need to attribute the focus of our conduct to leadership all the time? ... Sign up

 
1
VENKATESWARAN
Teacher, India
 

Heart and Mind are Two Different Entities of the Same Body

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1
Amssoms Richard
Manager, Belgium
 

Intelligence of the Heart and IQ

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0
Jacob George
Financial Consultant, India
 

EI Discussion Forum - Intelligence of the Heart

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0
Tito Rafael Hidalgo Barcia
Strategy Consultant, Ecuador
 

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Robert Sowell, United States
 

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Donvix Jahera
Teacher, Kenya
 

Charity Begins at Home

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0
RVRao
Management Consultant, India
 

Courage of Conviction

@Donvix Jahera : Can we modify this to say courage of conviction is an inherent quality of an indivi... Sign up

 
0
Jacob George
Financial Consultant, India
 

Perhaps we Should Talk about Wisdom of Heart

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1
Nhamo Phinias
HR Consultant, Zimbabwe
 

Inteligence of the Heart and Emotional Intelligence

Thank you Mr. Jacob for sharing with us such an interesting topic. I hope to get more on the intelli... Sign up

 
2
stanslaus kagisa, Tanzania
 

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3
Samir OUALID
Student (Other), Morocco
 

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0
Mxolisi Scwebu
Strategy Consultant, South Africa
 

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Maria Montero
Coach, Venezuela
 

IH People Build Trust

Excellent anecdotes which is the best way for others to see what it is meant. I agree with everythin... Sign up

 
0
COL SUNDER LALVANI
Coach, India
 

How Intelligence of the Heart and Vision are Related

@Stanslaus Kagisa : I concur, a relationship exists between heart and vision, albeit, with a differe... Sign up

 
4
Robert Sowell, United States
 

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1
Jun Aspacio
Director, Philippines
 

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5
Rebecca Roe
United States
 

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2
RVRao
Management Consultant, India
 

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2
stanslaus kagisa, Tanzania
 

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In law, my field for life, it is not necessarily for a person's heart to go together with his action... Sign up

 
2
Shubhra Gabel
Manager, India
 

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5
Rebecca Roe
United States
 

Philosophical Tenet Rarely Practiced

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0
MOHAMMED MALA MUSA
Analyst, Nigeria
 

Is Intelligence of the Heart Genetically Selected?

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3
Robert Sowell, United States
 

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0
VENKATESWARAN
Teacher, India
 

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6
Olga Flournoy
Consultant, United States
 

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@MOHAMMED MALA MUSA : Philosophical posits can be challenged. Genetics are another story. In profess... Sign up

 
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Jeketule Jacob Soko
Management Consultant, Kenya
 

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Arif ur Rehman
Professor, Pakistan
 

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0
Aries Musnandar
HR Consultant, Indonesia
 

IH in Islamic Perspective

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1
Prof. Alkis S. Magdalinos
Business Consultant, Greece
 

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0
Aries Musnandar
HR Consultant, Indonesia
 

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0
Jeketule Jacob Soko
Management Consultant, Kenya
 

Give to Caesar what Belongs to Caesar, and to God what Belongs to God

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0
Jacob George
Financial Consultant, India
 

EI Forum - from the Author

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0
Olga Flournoy
Consultant, United States
 

Intelligence of the Heart in Religious Perspective

@Jeketule Soko: interesting take, Alkis, Jeketule, and Aries, on the heart and love. According to ... Sign up

 
0
Prof. Alkis S. Magdalinos
Business Consultant, Greece
 

Intelligence of the Heart

Olga, thank you for your comments. My example of IH is myself. I have a very strong bent for IH and ... Sign up

 
2
COL SUNDER LALVANI
Coach, India
 

Intelligence of the Heart does not imply to be Soft

I believe, we need to understand that IH does not imply being soft on emotional issues. It means, be... Sign up

 
0
MOHAMMED MALA MUSA
Analyst, Nigeria
 

Intelligence of the Heart

@Olga Flournoy : thank you so much for the scientific explanation to my perspective on IK. It's real... Sign up

 
0
Olga Flournoy
Consultant, United States
 

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@Prof. Alkis S. Magdalinos: you refer to yourself in the present and the past as if you are or were ... Sign up

 
0
Zeb O. WATURUOCHA
Management Consultant, India
 

Intelligence of the Heart

@Col Sunder Lalvani: Col Sunder, you make an interesting point when you say that IH is not a matter... Sign up

 
2
COL SUNDER LALVANI
Coach, India
 

Importance of Spiritual Intelligence

@Zeb O. Waturuocha: Zeb, I must say, you have a wonderful way of paraphrasing my point of view. Nice... Sign up

 
0
KATHRYN STEINER, MBA
Entrepreneur, United States
 

Saying no in a non Confrontational and Respectful Manner

@Arif ur Rehman: it is always good to as you say know how to explain clearly a position we are takin... Sign up

 
0
RVRao
Management Consultant, India
 

Intelligence of the Heart

There is a confusion in understanding 'intelligence of heart', 'intelligence of logic' and emotional... Sign up

 
0
Arif ur Rehman
Professor, Pakistan
 

Intelligence - the Prologue

@Sushil Bhasin: let us not lose ourselves in academic dialogue - heart versus logic versus emotion -... Sign up

 
1
Robert Wamai, Kenya
 

Intelligence of the Heart: Leadership and Empathy

In my opinion, the first incidence of the lady in the train is the most powerful. It demonstrates tw... Sign up

 
0
Jacob George
Financial Consultant, India
 

My Favorite Story...

@Robert Wamai: well that's really an interesting idea (to pick the best incident mentioned). In th... Sign up

 
0
Arif ur Rehman
Professor, Pakistan
 

IH - the Window That Must Always Remain Open

@Robert Sowell: I have never ever regretted in my working life (spread over more than four decades) ... Sign up

 
2
Robert Wamai, Kenya
 

Intelligence of the Heart

Jacob, the third case is more of a demonstration of courage under fire more than empathy. The guy ha... Sign up

 
0
Jacob George
Financial Consultant, India
 

IH People -- to Robert

@Robert Wamai: yes Robert, you are right. But seems like we have a difference of opinion here! Jacob... Sign up

 
0
Rebecca Roe
United States
 

Sad You Feel This Way

@Rvrao: I am not of the opinion that the "golden rule" is rarely practiced. Don't lose hope my frien... Sign up

 
0
RVRao
Management Consultant, India
 

Sad You Feel This Way

@Rebecca Roe: I take your advice and continue with the feeling that hopes are better than fears. It ... Sign up

 
1
Jacob George
Financial Consultant, India
 

Wisdom of the Heart: 4 More Traits...

Acknowledgements and Preface I shall start by telling the feedback I got on my first article – “Int... Sign up

 
0
RVRao
Management Consultant, India
 

One More Train Incdent

@Jacob George I would like to say it is an enabling attitude of mind that makes a man positive.... Sign up

 
1
Jacob George
Financial Consultant, India
 

The Heart Rules

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0
Paramathmuni srinivas Kumar
India
 

Development of Virtues of Heart

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Maria Guia Garcia
Student (University), Australia
 

Intelligence of the Heart

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More on Emotional Intelligence:
Summary
DIscussion Topics
👀Intelligence of the Heart
(How) Can I improve my Emotional Intelligence?
Goleman's 3 Questions to Increase your Emotional Intelligence
The Benefits of Emotional Intelligence (EQ)
The Importance of Soft Skills for Young People
How to Moderate the Effect of Negative Moods on Your (Team's) Performance
Emotional Intelligence and Age
The Effects of Emotional Intelligence on Leadership
Soft Skills and Emotional Intelligence
The Role of Management in Developing EI and Soft Skills
Cross-cultural Validity of Emotional Intelligence
Ethical Emotional Intelligence?
3 Approaches Towards Emotional Intelligence
Emotional Intelligence versus IQ
Emotions versus Reason
EQ / EI Questionaire
Emotional Intelligence is NOT Opposite of Intelligence
How you Should Manage Yourself (Drucker)
The 4 Domains and 12 Competencies of Emotional Intelligence
Where does Wisdom come from?
Best Compliment: 'You must have a high EQ'.
Cleaning our Emotions
Emotional Intelligence - Better Predictor of Success then IQ
Emotional Intelligence = Maturity?
Emotional Intelligence of Groups and Companies
🔥How to Manage and Help a Grieving Employee?
Some Level of EQ and IQ Either Way is Needed
Are these Responses Proof of Emotional Intelligence?
EI and Sensitivity for Subconscious Mind
Mayer's Ability Model of Emotional Intelligence. Comparison Goleman
How can EQ and IQ be Combined?
Importance of Emotional Intelligence for Organisations
Understanding Emotions Logically
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