Fight or Collaborate? 5 Interpersonal Conflict Types

Fight or Collaborate? 5 Interpersonal Conflict Types

🔥NEW I just read an interesting article about personal relationship management. Peterson and Behfar argue you can and should broadly distinguish a conflict/collaboration continuum of 5 categories of interpersonal work relationships, depending on the extent to which the interests of 2 colleagues, people, or parties clash or are aligned (from most negative to most positive):

1. CONFLICT (Enemies) - Trying to defeat or deny another's interest. Playing a zero-sum game confronting the other. Make sure you understand the other's strengths and weaknesses. Look for alles to help you win.
2. COMPETITION (Rivals) - Working to deter another in order to protect or advance self-interests. Look for the common ground and analyze what really drives the rivalry.
3. INDEPENDENCE (Neighbors) - Acting to neutralize the impact of others on self-interests. Reduce your dependency of the other.
4. COOPERATION (Friends) - Maintaining self-interests while also advancing joint interests. Be careful as situations might change.
5. COLLABORATION (Allies) - Merging self-interests with the interests of others. When parties have important shared key interests and will benefit from a strong long-term relationship.

No single strategy is always best; smart people know when and how to apply a particular type, possibly adjusting their own style to the other's, balancing their own interests with the other's, carefully considering the risks and trade-offs, properly deciding how much to invest in each person, and when it's better to postpone taking action or to walk away.

❗Tip: The main starting point is to understand in each situation you have (at least 5) options and so do your colleagues. Their style/preference (for this situation) might well be different from yours…

Source: Peterson R.S. and Behfar K.J., "When to Cooperate with Colleagues and when to Compete", HBR Mar-Apr 2022, pp. 143-147.

		Comments Sort by date Sort by rating Rating
		3 Anonymous
	Competitive Team Member One of the members of my project team works, let's call him Mark, works hard and often late into the... Sign up

		6 Johan Roels Consultant, Belgium
	Fight or Collaborate... The Old 1+1 Story... In my book 'Cruciale dialogen' I called this some ten years ago the one plus one game. 1+1=0 is wha... Sign up

		1 SWAMINATHAN MURALI India
	Interpersonal Undercurrents While I agree with the presentation of Mr Peiterson et al there is still one more factor, I believe,... Sign up

		2 Jaap de Jonge Editor, Netherlands
	Communication in Interpersonal Competitive Relations @Johan Roels: Your 1+1 categories are very interesting and seem to focus on how various communicatio... Sign up

		2 Dainy Arroyo Manager, Mexico
	Not Collaborating Co-worker @Anonymous: I would recommend making Mark realize how important is that he collaborates with the tea... Sign up

		4 Michelle P. Tinio Business Consultant, Philippines
	Success is not a One man Event @Anonymous: If success is very important for him, then play on that. Let him understand that he is p... Sign up

		2 Maria Elena Hoffmann Management Consultant, Venezuela
	Really Interesting! I liked this article. I would like to know more about Murali's input. It sounds interesting to explo... Sign up

		1 Afiong Student (Other), Nigeria
	An Aggressive-Competitive and Non-Productive Team Member I have a member in my department that would not response to some piece of information but was pickin... Sign up

		3 Johan Roels Consultant, Belgium
	1+1 Categories @Jaap de Jonge: You have appreciately understood 'my' 1+1 communication categories. Communication IS... Sign up

		4 Jaap de Jonge Editor, Netherlands
	Interpersonal Communication and Relations @Johan Roels: Thank you for elaborating. Agreed, interpersonal communication is crucial in interpers... Sign up

		2 Johan Roels Consultant, Belgium
	My Take on 'a Conflict Model' @Jaap de Jonge: Indeed, not alone for a tango you have to be two who are willing to give and to take... Sign up

		2 Molokanova Professor, Ukraine
	Fight or Collaborate? 5 Interpersonal Conflict Types I like this Five Interpersonal Conflict Types classification. Note however that one does not always... Sign up

		2 Maurice Hogarth Consultant, United Kingdom
	Feeding Back on Mark's Behaviour @Afiong and @ Anonymous : This seems to be a situation requiring an immediate appraisal of performan... Sign up

		1 Jaap de Jonge Editor, Netherlands
	7 Ways to Counter Interpersonal Conflicts Regarding interpersonal conflicts, to work more effectively with "difficult" colleagues like microma... Sign up